30 April 2014

Midweek Pick-me-up


We all need a little mid-weekly pick me up, right?

Notebooks - Waterstones
A brand spankin' new Waterstones just opened up in York 
(Let's take a minute of silence to remember the late Republic)
As soon as I found the glorious stationary section I galloped around in a gleeful celebration.
And just to satisfy your imagination I can confirm that it was something like this.
happy animated GIF

The Proclaimers 
You absolutely can not listen to The Proclaimers without smiling at their beautiful Scottish accents.
When I sing along to them I suddenly become David Tennant in a kilt. Click here for a good time.

Redvines + Pacman Energy Drink
I'm currently slurping juice through a redvine because that is just where life has brought me.

Collection Nail Varnish and Eyeliner 
I actually love this eyeliner, it has a really precise brush and I can just do one big 'Swooosh' and then boom I did done that eyeliner.

Pantene Heat Defence Spray
I've heard a lot of good things about Pantene on the blogsphere recently, so I thought I'd jump all up in that grill.

(Sorry for the appalling quality of the top photo, but I ate the edible produce so I couldn't take it agian)
Sad Face
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27 April 2014

The One With The Disgruntled Cow - another true story.

The One With The Disgruntled Cow.

I was plodding along on my morning jog - oblivious to the world.
When suddenly a cow came hurtling around the corner, we both came to an abrupt stop 
and our eyes locked in an intense rage. Was I on his turf? Why would a cow be in such a hurry? 

We both stood still and watched each other intently as wildlife began to gather around us.
Something was about to go down.

The cow looked towards his cow companion and gave him a knowing nod. 
I felt my heart drop, death by cow would not look good on my gravestone.

Both cows started slowly walking towards me. 
Panic began to take over and I turned for back up, but my companion had already 
fled the scene and was long gone.

I had no back up - only a squirrel who seemed more interested in his ballsack. 

This is ridiculous, what are they going to do?

The cows began charging towards me and I began to run for my life.
I jumped over three fences, sustained a concussion and scaled a wall in an emotional frenzy

Death by cow.
Gone and promptly forgotten 
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22 April 2014

Marc Jacobs Daisy Eau de Toilette.

I had way too much fun picking daisies for this - can I get a holla for Estrogen? 

This is my favourite perfume of spring time, it reminds me of freshly cut grass and early mornings. 
Though I do have to suppress the urge to put on a floral number and prance around 
in a field of flowers when wearing it.

Hope everyone had a lovely Easter ♥
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18 April 2014

I AM NOT A DESSERT PERSON - a true story.



I AM NOT A DESSERT PERSON srsly.

. I hate chocolate.
 I like it in wee tiny amounts, but anything more than that and ooh man is it a whole other story.

.I am still trying desperately to repress The Great Time Out Bar Incident of 05.    *
I hovered on deaths door till the early hours of dawn; deliriously trying to write out my will from the bathroom floor.
(I've no idea who Rodriguez The Bear is, but apparently he is entitled to everything I own in hopes that one day he will find himself.) What can I say, I'm just poetic like that.

. I hate cake. No cake is good cake. 
I mean give me all the delicious frosting and butter-cream but keep yo dry sponge to yo self Mary.
Oh and what crazy sombitch thought it would be good idea putting Jam in cake. NO STOP. 
You are hurting more people than you are helping.

.Why end your meal on such a sickly note?
So you've just devoured an amazing meal from Frankie & Benny's * (you went with the burger - good choice) 
Why would you go ruin it with a stuffy sickly bleh dessert which leaves you feeling all yucky. 
WHY. TELL ME WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO CAUSE SUCH ANARCHY. 

*It wasn't really in 05, it was last month but I needed to add it for dramatic effect or it will never be taken seriously for the screenplay. 
* Yes, I am a 8 year old girl.
* Please refer to the previous statement.

Grace approved desserts include:
Shortbread, Hot Chocolate and Milkshake. *
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